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Joke...
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Adult Disney Jokes
Cinderella wants to go to the ball, but her wicked stepmother won't let her. As
Cinderella sits crying in the garden, her fairy godmother appears, and promises
to provide Cinderella with everything she needs to go to the ball, but only on
two conditions. "First, you must wear a diaphragm." Cinderella agrees. "What's
the second condition?" "You must be home by 2 a.m. Any later, and your
diaphragm will turn into a pumpkin." Cinderella agrees. The appointed hour
comes and goes, and Cinderella doesn't show up. Finally, at 5 a.m. Cinderella
shows up, looking love struck and very satisfied. "Where have you been?"
demands the Fairy godmother. "Your diaphragm was supposed to turn into a
pumpkin three hours ago!!!"
"I met a prince, Fairy Godmother. He took care of everything." "I know of no
prince with that kind of power! Tell me his name!" "I can't remember,
exactly... Peter Peter, something or other...."
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Pinocchio had a human girlfriend who would sometimes complain about splinters
when they were having sex. Pinocchio, therefore, went to visit Gepetto to see
if he could help. Gepetto suggested he try little sandpaper wherever indicated
and Pinocchio skipped away enlightened. A couple weeks later, Gepetto saw
Pinocchio bouncing happily through town and asked him, "How's the girlfriend?"
Pinocchio replied, "Who needs a girlfriend?"
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Little Red Riding Hood was walking through the woods when suddenly the Big Bad
Wolf jumped out from behind a tree and holding a sword to her throat, said,
"Red, I'm going to screw your brains out!" To that, Little Red Riding Hood
calmly reached into her picnic basket and pulled out a .44 magnum and pointed
it at him and said, "No you're not! You're going to eat me, just like it says
in the book!"
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Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse were in divorce court and the judge said Mickey,
"You say here that your wife is crazy." Mickey replied, "I didn't say she was
crazy, I said she's fucking Goofy."
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Snow White saw Pinocchio walking through the woods so she ran up behind him,
knocked him flat on his back, and then sat on his face crying, "Lie to me! Lie
to me!"
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Did you know... Captain Hook died from jock itch.
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One day Jane met Tarzan in the jungle. She was very attracted to him and during
her questions about his life she asked him how he managed for sex. "What's
that" he asked. She explained to him what sex was and he said, "Oh, I use a
hole in the trunk of a tree." Horrified, she said, "Tarzan you have it all
wrong but I will show you how to do it properly." She took off her clothes, lay
down on the ground and spread her legs wide "Here," she said, "You must put it
in here." Tarzan removed his loincloth, stepped closer and then gave her an
almighty kick in the crotch. Jane rolled around in agony. Eventually she
managed to gasp, "What the hell did you do that for?" "Just checking for bees"
said Tarzan.
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| Category: | Adult
Rated-R
Sex
Good |
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| Description: | Adult Disney Jokes |
| Date Added: | 09/09/2002 |
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